Memee's Musings

Sometimes I Feel

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by

memeethemuse
in , ,

Sometimes I Feel |Memee's Poetry PartiesSometimes I feel
like giving up
that no one cares
if I am here
or I am there.

Sometimes I feel
I should stop trying
why bother,
no one is listening.

Sometimes I feel
like trying.
I feel like trying
again and again
and again.

Sometimes I feel
like if I keep trying
you’ll start listening,
you’ll start caring.

And sometimes I feel
that if you are listening
and starting to care
that it really does matter
if I am here or if I am there.

So I plod along day after day
hoping that soon it will be
the day.

The day when I not only feel,
but the day when
I know:
I make a difference.
I matter.

That is the day
that I will
define myself
with the word:
Success.

☀ ☀ ☀ ☀ ☀ Join me at the linky party! ☀ ☀ ☀ ☀ ☀

I am a total beginner-beginner at poetry and created Memee’s Poetry Parties in an attempt to challenge myself (or more accurately force myself to be challenged) at this form of writing. It does not come easily to me at all. If you enjoy poetry and want to give a poke at it I encourage you to join my monthly poetry party, whether you’re brand new to poetry and writing or a veteran writer we all learn from and appreciate one another. It is my hope that we will all find inspiration and encouragement, and make lasting friendships while growing our writing skills and our blogs.

So if you liked my poem I hope you’ll consider joining this month’s linky party: Success Stories.

Please tag your post with #DefiningSuccess and #memeespoetryparties.

And don’t forget to pick up your participation badge here!

Comments

27 responses to “Sometimes I Feel”

  1. any1mark66 Avatar
    any1mark66

    Very nicely done. I like the change of feelings you put inside.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      Thank you! It’s what I have been feeling with my blogging. I love it. I hate it. It frustrates me. It makes me happy. Patience and persaverence… that’s what I keep telling myself.

      When I first began my blog I had a lot of angst in my life and I got a lot of comment feedback. Now that I am in a relatively “happy place” I feel isolated because I am not getting feedback. I just have to keep remembering that I started this thing for myself. And it is a place to delve deeper into my thoughts and find out how I really feel about things because, writing helps me to process. 🙂

      Thank you for the feedback, I really do appreciate hearing from you. I hope you’ll put your thoughts on success into a poem and join the linkup!

      Like

      Reply
      1. any1mark66 Avatar
        any1mark66

        You’re welcome. I should do more feedback. I put the #’s in mine “success” post. I’ll have to go back and try to link again with badge.

        Like

  2. jadekmoore Avatar
    jadekmoore

    I love this and you’ve written it in a way that others who might feel the same. can relate to.

    Like

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      Thank you so much, Jade. Blogging is frustrating. My niche is I don’t have a niche, I blog about what is on my mind. But receiving feedback, that makes me feel not so alone, ya know?

      Thanks for the comment. I am about to link it to the party. I don’t vote and I cannot win, but if it weren’t for my poetry party I wouldn’t even try my hand at poetry. I see it as an art form and it does not come as naturally to me as writing little flash fiction pieces. But even for those, there needs to be inspiration.

      I love to write, so I keep at it. But it is definately a love-hate relationship!

      Hmm, maybe that’ll have to be next months theme: Love-Hate relationships. That defines a lot of different things. I might just do that!

      Thanks again for the comment. You’ve made my day, Jade!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. jadekmoore Avatar
        jadekmoore

        I think you’ve just made my day by telling me I’ve made yours! It is always a nice feeling to know that people are reading and enjoying your writing – I get shocked when people enjoy mine, but I’m so glad that I’m putting my poetry on here. I like this style of poem. I linked my poem to the party yesterday, so I hope that has linked okay, I’m glad to be a part of it and will try my best to continue every month with you.
        I understand what you mean by love/hate relationship. There’s that saying about writers that try to find every excuse under the sun not to write. I find that I absolutely love writing, but sometimes I just want to ignore my work for a while instead of sticking at it! I definitely see writing as an art form and a craft. It is a creative release but also very difficult.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. memeethemuse Avatar
        memeethemuse

        btw, did you grab your badge? You’ve earned it!

        MPP Badge

        Liked by 1 person

      3. jadekmoore Avatar
        jadekmoore

        I did get my badge and I have made a post here: https://jadekmoore.wordpress.com/2015/10/18/memees-musings-poetry-party/

        Like

      4. memeethemuse Avatar
        memeethemuse

        Nice!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Hayley Avatar
    Hayley

    This was very sad – and I think you should keep persevering – my blog also has no niche – I think as long as your blog is honest that others will always relate 🙂 lovely heartfelt poem xx

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      As I said, I will keep writing. I find it very soothing to my soul and enlightening as to what comes out of my head.

      I am especially enjoying the ventures into telling stories. That comes very natural to me and may be “where I belong” on the internet. I have not really figured out the how’s and where’s to beginning a story (like an author would) I need something to spark the imagination into a certain direction.

      However, when I begin “telling” the story it just sorta materializes into a whole with the beginning, middle and end… full circle. I love it. I love how the brain just creates the stories as my fingers do the typing. I feel “smart” having it come so easily. And my stories seem to garner the most interest (as few as there are). So I will probably just keep working on mastering that. I seem to always just miss the blogging/writing classes by a few days. Don’t get me wrong, I love every post I have written and feel proud of them. I would not change a single one. However, when I first began this journey I saw the power, the reward of people engaging with me and that caught fire. I liked the interaction with all of the people. And I think that lead me astray. I have been trying to engage people ever since. And failing miserably. So I have to find my way back to not caring about anyone else and just finding the personal satisfaction in it for myself.

      I will continue forth with the Poetry Parties although they give me the most heartbreak and I always feel disillusioned afterwards. However posts inviting others to engage with me, like the Doorstep Pumpkin Challenge, will go away. I love the holidays and wanted to share in that with others. It’s just not happening.

      My one-year blogging anniversary is Oct 31st and the people I began with in Blogging 101 either gave up/got too busy/or have thousands of followers. That is frustrating to see… depressing actually. Because my favorites are the ones that sem to have stopped their writing.

      I think a big part of my issue is tagging. I don’t really know how to do that effectively. Do I do singular? Do I do plural? I don’t know, so I do both. Is it blogging101 or blogging 101? I don’t know so I do both. Do hashtags work at all on WordPress for people searching tags or is it only useful in Google, Bing and other search engines seeking out those tags?

      Sorry for rambling. It’s 4:30 in the morning and I cannot sleep. My mind is busy racing in directions that I don’t want it to. I would like it to drift away to sleep; ya know what I mean? Also, as I said, the way I work things out in my mind is just by letting my fingers do all the work. I don’t really know what I think about something unless I am at a typewriter, computer or have a pen and journal in hand. 🙂

      I tried doing a bunch of research on what creates successful blogs and it said keep it short (not possible for the aforementioned reasons), have a specific niche (that’s not who I am) and write for everyone else not yourself (also not going to happen). So statistically I am doomed to fail as a blogger. So I have to redefine myself from blogger to online diary-keeping (which was actually how I viewed it the first few month’s of writing.

      Okay, that’s my conclusion. Again, so sorry for the ramblings.

      ☀ Memee

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Hayley Avatar
        Hayley

        Haha Memee I loved reading your ramblings – I read it on my dinner break at work – felt like you were chatting to me in the staff room hehe To be fair, I just blag it with the whole tagging thing, I’m not 100% sure myself, although, I’m sure there is a help section (somewhere) on wordpress which may enlighten us! I’ve only had my blog for about a year too but have mostly participated in the writing prompts (writing 101, poetry 201) etc I feel it nice to have some inspiration to work with! Anyway – dinner break over! Stick to what makes you happy and don’t worry/compare yourself to other bloggers out there! xx

        Liked by 1 person

      2. memeethemuse Avatar
        memeethemuse

        Thank you Hayley, so much. This response brought tears to my eyes!

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Hayley Avatar
        Hayley

        You’re welcome xx

        Like

  4. xiaohuamaobiji Avatar
    xiaohuamaobiji

    I love this month’s challenge, I’ve submitted my poem and yay I made it before closing date! 😀

    Like

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      Yay, you got it in on time! That makes me really happy 🙂 I have already figured out next month’s theme too. So keep those creative juices flowing!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. xiaohuamaobiji Avatar
        xiaohuamaobiji

        Yay Yay Yeah! Not gonna miss next month too!

        Like

      2. memeethemuse Avatar
        memeethemuse

        Yay, Yay, Yeah! You’re poems help make the event a success 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. xiaohuamaobiji Avatar
        xiaohuamaobiji

        That’s great!! Am happy to participate 😀

        Like

  5. Marquessa Avatar
    Marquessa

    Thanks for sharing. I was feeling just like that last week!

    Like

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      I have been struggling with these feelings for about 4 months now. I mean it confuses me. I love my blog. I love the look and feel of it. I love the monthly event. I love the short stories.

      So why do I feel like no one else likes it?

      And further, why the heck should I care about how many followers I have or that people like the preview showing in the feeder but don’t bother to read the whole piece and why does people not commenting bother me so much?

      Sorry, now I’m ranting. I’ve just got to figure out how to love it without hating it.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Marquessa Avatar
        Marquessa

        Ranting is good. When I stumbled on the first WP challenge and started to blog, it was meant as a short term thing for me, myself and I to reignite my passion for writing fiction. Of course the likes/follows/comments makes me feel good but not as good as the feeling of writing for “me” as often as I can for me with no external expectations. And don’t forget, oftentimes bloggers read but may not necessarily leave a trace that they did…😕

        Liked by 1 person

      2. memeethemuse Avatar
        memeethemuse

        LOL. I started blogging for ME but lost track of that and began noticing how well everyone else did while I am still at 300 followers after a year. If I wasn’t reading other people’s blogs I would be happily ignorant. And, I read more often then I comment so intellectually I should be aware of that truth.

        I’m going to find my way back to not caring because I honestly wouldn’t change anything about what I have written thus far. I just love it so, I want to share it with the world and want the world to reinforce that my beautiful baby is indeed beautiful.

        Human flaws… ugh!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Marquessa Avatar
    Marquessa

    I know! 😊 In the new year, if its possible, I may turn off the widget so that the number of followers doesn’t show for a while…as an experiment.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      Great idea. I’m gonna do it now. Then I won’t look at it each day with disappointment!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
    2. memeethemuse Avatar
      memeethemuse

      I did it. It was super easy, you just uncheck the box that says to show your number. And you know what, I feel awesome. It is a huge relief. Now I am free to write because I love to write! Thank you for the idea/reminder of that possibility!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Marquessa Avatar
        Marquessa

        Awesome!👍 In 2016 i’ll be making a few changes too!

        Liked by 1 person

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