A Letter of Introduction – by Embeecee

via Letters to the Mind
Contributing Author: Embeecee

A letter of introduction | Letters to the MindI have been in therapy a good portion of my life and I don’t have a definitive diagnosis as such.  They keep changing it to suit the therapy group I’m participating with at the time.   I don’t know if they don’t know how to categorize people like me or if it’s ME, because part of my own complaint is the ability to morph into what I think the ‘person in charge’ wants to hear.

In the latest therapy effort, I’ve tried hard not to do that and to be as honest as I can about my problems.   I still feel pretty mixed up about it all though.   I do a group therapy session about once a week (it’s a long drive and our weather has been bad, plus I’ve been sick a lot this winter so far) so I don’t always make the group session.   In that group we deal with addictions of various kinds, of which I didn’t ever really think I had any, save food, and so I have been resistant to the process. Others deal with drugs, alcohol, sexual addictions and the usual type of stuff.  I’ve felt like an outsider.   I’m also a good deal older than most of the women who attend that group, and I’m further along (in my own estimation) in the healing/dealing process.

It’s been odd therefore to realize that in that group I’ve discovered some depths to my own mental illness that I hadn’t considered before.   The group is a trauma group, all of us in there have suffered some sort of traumatic event, whether it is childhood or spousal abuse, abandonment, physical abuse or whatever fits under the umbrella of “abuse.”

And again I’m worried that I over-identify with the ailments of the other patients. One has pretty severe OCD and through her sharing I’ve identified some traits of that in myself.   I always knew I had elements of OCD, but I thought they were pretty minor (I continue to think that), so I never thought I ‘had’ OCD.

I overthink things.  And this ‘letter of introduction’ if you want to call it such is getting too long.

My own problems include:

  • Chronic depression
  • Dysthymia (or major depression)
  • Insomnia
  • Possible bipolar II (depressive bipolar disorder)
  • Possible BPD (borderline personality disorder)
  • Very mild (to me) OCD
  • Agoraphobia (very mild)
  • Social phobia/anxiety
  • Slight paranoia

It sounds really stark and overwhelming listed out that way.   I don’t think if you met me IRL, you’d even suspect any of these.   I have learned over decades to hide them well.  Privately I know I have some issues and I’m not comfortable around people.   Someone recently told me I have a true introverted nature, which in psycho-speak means I draw energy from myself best, and I expend it when I have to be around other people.   Being in crowds exhausts me and I don’t do well if I’m forced to wait for things or if someone is holding up the progression.   I find that I’m becoming more vocal about it, and this leads me to want to stay home.   I’m embarrassed by being that way, but I’m finding it happens more and more.   People stare at you if you are grumbling to yourself about what an asshole the guy in front is being.   Or if you openly ask this asshole if they are EVER going to conclude their business and get the %$@# out of your way.   I have anger issues.

Well that’s enough about it for today.   Thanks for inviting me here and for listening.

Author’s note: I was invited to Letters of the Mind by B.L. Memee of Memee’s Musings, and I thank her for offering this chance to address mental illness in a safe venue.


About the author:

I’m Melanie. I have been diagnosed with major chronic depression.   I also deal with social phobia and anxiety.

I’m a 56 year old woman who was born and raised, and remains in Utah in the United States of America. I have degenerative bone disease (type undiagnosed), diabetes and the mental health issues [I’ve discussed], and therefore I am under disability and retired now. I am widowed (going on five years in February). I live alone and have one pet, and I prefer it this way. I am considered reserved. I am Mormon in faith, but I am not judgemental nor do I consider myself holier than thou or anything. I try to be open-minded and accepting of everyone. I TRY.  🙂

Blog: Sparks From a Combustible Mind

“Life Is Not Waiting for the Storm to Pass; It’s About Learning to Dance in the Rain.”

☀ ☀ ☀ ☀ ☀

Please, if your life is impacted by mental illness help spread awareness and understanding by writing to that illness and sharing it at Letters of the Mind blog project.

Click here to Contribute.

☀ Memee

Submitted to Letters to the Mind by Embeecee Dec 2015
A Letter of Introduction post: © Embeecee (Author) & Letters to the Mind (Publisher) 2015-2017. All rights reserved.
A Letter of Introduction by Embeecee post © Memee’s Musings, 2016-2018. All rights reserved.

And the nominations go to…

And the Nominees Are... | Memee's Musings

The Oscars are tonight, are you excited? Do you and your friends get all gowned up, drink champagne and watch together?  If not, you should!  It’s a lot of fun, especially when there are games and prizes involved (and did I mention the gowns and the champagne?!)

I love Awards Season. Always have. And if you’re a regular reader, a member of Memee’s Minion Army, then you already know from reading my Golden Globes Jot that I love watching the red carpet show just as much! Well, this post is my red carpet and these are your nominations, not for the Oscar but for the One Lovely Blog Award! click that link to see my acceptance speech which preceded this announcement, lists the rules, and contains your trophy!

Arriving now in random order are:

1. A Reading Writr

2. A Real Messy Beautiful Twisted Sunshine

3. Let’s Talk About the L Word

4. A New Perspective Perhaps

5. Coloring Outside the Lines

6. Steps Times Two

7. Joys of Joel

8. Orange Marmelade Press

9. Magical Corner

Congratulations to all of the nominees and winners!

 

☀ Memee

Oscar photo by Davidlohr Bueso; modified graphics & text added per the CC 2.0 License

I’m a Versatile Blogger!

versatile-blogger

 

I’ve been recognized and labelled as a “versatile blogger” by Rachel Ann over at Start With Sparkles. Thank you, Rachel! Some people view a blog that has no particular niche a mess, unworthy of acknowledgment; however, by definition “versatile” is in fact a great talent. So now I’ve got to come up with seven clever things to reveal about myself while proving I am indeed versatile. Oh, Rachel, I do hope I live up to your expectations!

1. I love those games that were flying across the walls of Facebook in 2009-2010, it is what got me addicted to the website and, honestly, I miss them. Now I have to entertain myself with “click” games, which is so mind-numbing not to mention socially isolating.

2. I am a Days of Our Lives addict. I admit it. I have seen almost every episode since I was 15 years old… that’s 31 years for those of you counting. A lot of people say nothing ever happens on soap operas and that if you missed a day or a week you wouldn’t miss anything. However I have always noticed that if miss a day I am always confused about what is going on when I find my way back. And I am pretty sure it’s not a case of me being dumb. Maybe I pay more attention than the average viewer and so I notice the minute changes of story or perhaps it’s just that the days that I have missed are coincidentally the most important episode of the year, but I doubt it. I am glad that NBC allows me to view episodes after they have aired. Now I don’t have to be confused.

3. I am enjoying learning the art of writing a story. It amazes me just how easily it comes once I figure out the first sentence or two. Memee’s Supershort Stories

4. I hate talking politics. In fact I hate it so much I am not going to go into the reasons why for fear people will want to begin arguing with me and each other in the comment section. Sorry I mentioned it.

5. I live for love yet I feel that romantic love has alluded me thus far.

6. In the 70s I was a child model for the mega-chain Montgomery Wards and that began a lifelong relationship in the modeling industry both in front of the camera and behind the scenes.

7. And just to prove all models aren’t dumb I will include the fact that I was a professional court reporter for ten years.

If you are nominated, you’ve been awarded the Versatile Blogger award.

  •  Thank the person who gave you this award. It’s common courtesy.
  •  Include a link to their blog. That’s also common courtesy — if you cannot figure that out, go to their nomination post and thank them personally.
  •  Next, select 15 blogs/bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly who you deem as versatile and excellent in their writing and nominate/award them with the Versatile Blogger Award. It is good practice to let them know of your nomination on their about page.
  •  Finally, share 7 things about yourself. The person who nominated you probably wants to learn more about you and so do your regular followers.

And so it is that I shed the cloak of Blogger Without Purpose and proudly don my Versatile Blogger sash and announce my nominations for the Versatile Blogger award.

1. Mindstorms and Randomness
2. Coloring Outside the lines
3. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Internet
4. Randoms by a Random
5. Listen to the Babe

6. A Cooking Pot and Twisted Tales
7. What Sandra Thinks
8. The Falling Thoughts
9. Butterfly Ramblings
10. Riddle from the Middle

11. Hugh’s Views and News
12. Curious Queendom
13. Problems with Infinity
14. Hummingbird Redemption
15. Theory About a Theory

It has taken me 3 months to complete this post since my own nomination because I am very choosy in my nominating process — Thank you Rachel Ann for your patience with me! I want to nominate for you my readers and minions, only the very best that I find out there. And with this one, versatility was an additional layer of choosyness! And if that wasn’t enough, I wanted to be sure they hadn’t already received this award. Anyhow, these are the people who are relatively new to me and, in my humble opinion, excellent versatile bloggers, the best of the best, the cream of the crop! Check each of them out, I’m sure you’ll find a new favorite amongst them. (And yes, I am crossing my fingers that some of the newest of newbies are still actively blogging. Two of my nominees have become “award free” and three of them have, since I placed them on my list, received this award from another. But I’m not going backward. Everyone remains in position and on my list. If I rubbed those people out, we’d likely never get to this point of published acceptance!)

Oh, and guess what, nominees: There’s an added bonus to winning this award: There is an entire blog dedicated to it and you can link your acceptance post to it and even more people will learn of your versatility and choose to visit your blog! How’s that for an added bonus? Oh, and did I mention, you can go there to choose your own trophy if you don’t want the green one I picked out and attached to this post! It’s true even the badge is versatile: Everything VBA

Share Your World

Share Your World banner

Share Your World is the blogging event for bloggers who love to answer random questions. Every Monday 3 random questions are posed, an interesting prompt is proffered, as well as the opportunity to share something you are feeling grateful for.

CEE:  What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “fun”?

MEMEE: Giggling, laughing, tickling, playing, sharing… it is all part of Falling in Love. And it is wonderful, delightful, fun.

CEE: What is your favorite time of day?

MEMEE: Assuming day refers to the greater 24-hour period, my favorite is 2:00 A.M. The world has gone to sleep leaving behind silence and peace. I feel connected to the universe and to my own spirit. It is the time of day when I feel the most complete.

Make time for the quiet moments, as God whispers and the world is loud. — Author Unknown

CEE: Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want have a evening with?

MEMEE: I miss my son a lot right now because I moved 2 states away 5 weeks ago. We’re very close and this is our first real separation. It is good for us because it will allow us both to grow more independent, but it is very, very difficult.

CEE: Complete this sentence: Something that anyone can do that will guarantee my smile is…be gentle, kind, considerate and compassionate for the person standing next to you. It is a beautiful thing to witness and even more glorious to be a part of. 

CEE: Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

MEMEE: With each new month comes opportunity. I am grateful that last week was the beginning of a new month and am looking forward to passing through the doors of opportunity that have been presenting themselves to me.

Liebster Award part deux

Liebster part deux | Memee's MusingsWell, I’ve gone and stepped in it again. It is another award with lots of fun-filled questions for me to answer, questions for me to devise and ask of other bloggers… Yep, that’s right, it’s the Liebster Award (part deux).

Thanks goes out to Liz in Sweden for the opportunity to share more of myself with all of you! And hopefully this time it won’t take me 2 weeks to complete despite the broken elbow!

What’s your favorite way to pass time? What do you enjoy most?

My favorite, like my favorite favorite? Uh, making love with my honey-baby-sweetheart, of course. Not the blunt, straight-up answer you were expecting, was it?

Describe your personality with only one word.

Clever!

What’s been the most important/transformative moment in your life during the past year?

I quit my job, moved a thousand miles away from home and into a home with a young married couple, 2 children, 2 cats, 2 kittens and 3 dogs as I return to school.

What is standing between you and happiness?

Me. But everyday I am stretching my internal bindings and finding more treasure within myself than I ever imagine existing within me.

What (or who) are you most grateful for?

I am most grateful for my son. Although he turns 21 this month and no longer views me as the Be All and End All of his world my unending love for him enriches every moment of my life.

Name one thing you’ve always wanted to do, but have never done before?

Be the bride.

Yes, I suffer from Always the Bridesmaid syndrome. I am not looking for a husband and truly, at this point, if I ever do marry I am not sure I want to live with my future husband. I do not want to take care of another human being due to proximity, social expectation, or “duty.” I do however long for a man to stand up publicly and tell everyone in his world that I am the one that makes every moment of life”s struggles worth it. And, who am I kidding, I want the party, the dress, the focus and attention. Wow, this sounds very narcissistic but honestly, I always give everything of myself to everybody and anybody. I just feel like I am finally finding my own way and don’t want to lose me again.

What is the most important/most meaningful thing in life?

Love, relationships and faith. Those three things make up our purpose in this life.

In one sentence share your wish for your personal future.

My ideal future features me in a lucrative career that allows me to enjoy warm summer nights relishing in the deep, bonded connections I will share with my love, my son and his future family.

Where do you find your inspiration + motivation?

God feeds me and keeps me nourished. Without Him I was withering away. Acknowledging that I had put our relationship on the back burner and striving to renew His spirit within me has strengthened and healed me allowing me to grow greater within my own spirit in every aspect of my life.

What is your motto in life?

Yes, girl, you can!

So now that you’ve read all of that, if you can’t get enough of me you can learn more reading the questions posed to me in my first Liebster award.

My 11 Random Questions to nominees Are:

1. Do you believe in ghosts and if so have you seen any?
2. What animals, if any, do you currently reside with. Names too please!
3. Tell me, what is your favorite nickname and why?
4. Is there anyone that you would step in front of a train for? If yes, who is it?
5. Can you wiggle your ears?
6. Do you brush your teeth in the shower?
7. Why do you think drinking water from a bottle is a good idea?
8. Have you ever eaten anything that sounds gross but wasn’t?
9. Do you ever talk or walk in your sleep?
10. Are you easy to read?
11. Is there someone important to you that suffers from a mental illness (yourself included)?

Liebster is supposed to be for new bloggers, but I think if it’s new to me or new to you, it counts! And truly, if they do not want to participate it is okay by me. Really all I want is to share them with all of you! However, if they do accept the award, answer the questions and pay it forward all the more reward for me!

1. Daisy is a fellow “sufferer” and advocate of mental health. She is brand new to blogging so head over and show her how wonderfully inviting the blogging community can be. Daisy in the Willows

2. Yinglan participates in a lot of writing prompts and it is always fun to watch as someone’s skills grow and develop. Lately I have found that I am gravitating toward reading fiction pieces more than opinion posts. If you like fiction too or want to challenge yourself to write stories, as I am learning to do, visit Yinglan at her blog, A Simple Life.

3. I recently discovered the wonderful prompting blog — because of Yinglan — entitled: Mind Love Misery Menagerie every aspiring writer should definately check this blog out! It is hosted by 7 different individuals posting prompts with 7 different genres… that’s a new challenge every day of the week. I am going to be watch Yves and Rose to see what imaginative rumblings they’ll spark in me.

4. I’ve been following Little Calico’s Journal for a while now. Honestly, just visiting her home page is enough to put a smile on my face (each and every time). Yen is a poet. Poets are a special breed of writers that I cannot quiet define. I marvel at their ability to spin words into artful creations.

5. This nomination came about unexpectedly just this moment. I happened to stumble upon the blog From the Sticks to the Bricks and Back Again and discovered a clever feature Lynne invited over from Twitter… why had no one thought of it before? #FF or Following Friday now has a home on WordPress! I love sharing my blogging finds with others (as I mentioned above, that’s really what this nomination process is about for me, sharing them with you! I am going to enjoy following this blog and discovering new blogs to follow through her #FF posts!

I am posting the Liebster infographic below explaining the official rules for Liebster, do with it as you will. I usually adapt blogging rules to suit my desires and so can you!

Liebster Rules

Sharing is Caring – a blogging #MeetandGreet

#MeetandGreet introductionsI joined my first meet and greet over at Dream Big, Dream Often who had reblogged from Lessons from my Daughter. There were only 4 simple rules, and I am not one for rules, the less the better and I modify when I must. In this case, I modified only the “reblog” by creating my own post and pinging the originators, otherwise I stuck to the rules… this time.

The Rules

I am not big on rules but here is how I see this going.

1. Like this posting.

2. In the comments, introduce yourself, put a link to your blog (if you have one) and put a link to a blog you enjoy reading.

3. Reblog this post so more people can see it and share their blogs.

4. Come back and discover new blogs.

I promise to visit every link posted in the comments or pingbacks and I will read your posts, like or comment and, hopefully, find many great blogs to follow!

My introduction read as follows:

“My name is BriannaLouise Memee and my blog is Memee’s Musings. I can be found on WordPress, Facebook, Tumblr, Blogher, Pinterest and Twitter. Last year was full of tragedy and life changes… it’s a familiar story: Blogging helped me to become whole again.

“My tagline remains as true today as it did when I began: “Thoughts about life, death and the world around me.” Memee’s Musings is not a blog that rotates around my personal pain although you can find it weaved within.

I host a once monthly linky party for poets, #memeespoetryparties. I advocate for domestic animals on Saturdays, post my favorite quotes on Wednesdays, share gratitude on Thursdays and feature guest bloggers on Sundays. While on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays you can find postings about anything from what his happening in the world around me to mental health to random thoughts to poetry and flash fiction.

“Although you won’t find any parenting advice, book reviews or recipes on my blog (unless they are proffered by guest bloggers) I view my blog as a smorgasbord of delights which I hope you will enjoy as much as I do!

“I am amazed by Allison’s poetry found at: People, Things and Life.

“I am inspired by Chris at: Surviving the Spector.

“I find community through Ember’s life shares on Brighton Bipolar.

“And AuthorSBMazing challenges my imagination, inspiration and writing growth with her Finish It! events on her blog: Author S B Mazing.

“I hope you’ll love what you find on my blog and value what you find on the blogs I am suggesting!”

It’s your turn, just do it!

☀ Memee

Blogging Advice for Newbies: From My Blog Audience

via Daily (w)rite
Author: Damyanti Biswas

Ray Bradbury via Daily write

Daily (w)rite is a 6-year old blog now, a fair number of turns of the hourglass. Write Every Day was my motto when I started it, but over the years I find I like listening more than talking on this blog.

From time to time, I’ve asked my audience for their opinions and advice on blogging related topics. The community has been generous in providing responses. I’m posting the links below for those new to my blog, or to blogging in general, who write to me asking for blogging tips. Continue reading